Stealing blog ideas...

Poodle fact of the day: The breed is actually German in origin, and the names comes from the name Pudel, which means puddle, for water dog.

Because I'm supposed to be researching poodles (see, I learned ONE THING) I'm stealing an idea from my friend Mary F over at Mary's Bandwagon because she said, 'use it on your blog.'

So here's 10 things to know about my writing (this should be an eye-opener for all involved):

1)In a written document, it's a given that I'll have at least 6 things spelled wrong, and spell check will catch 4 of them.

2) I wasn't meant to be a short contemporary writer--I can't have my characters say hello in less than 50,000 words, never mind have them meet, have sex, break up and resolve their problems with a satisfying ending. Of course, I could use my favorite salutation--DUDE!--and get right to the...er...point? Yes, SZ, I'm thinking about WINKIES.

3) I will write/edit anything for money. Case point, my second ghostwritten book was about modifying import cars (dude, pimping the RIDE!). "Miss Editor, you want me to add a cowboy pregnant with an alien's baby, keep it all a secret, and give the cowboy a case of amnesia to boot? In 80,000 words? For money? Yes, Miss Editor! My pleasure!"

4) If I decided to be a writer in the past, I too would have hacked off a body part like that painter dude (Monet? I know Julie will correct me on this). And you know why I would hack off a body part??? NO SPELLCHECK. I failed my high school term paper because of my typing skills.

5) I have to say NO to research at times, because I get sucked into the void of knowledge. It's even worse now with the 'net. I'll start out on one subject (oh, like POODLES) and discover the meaning of merkin (if you don't know what it is, look it up! It's way interesting.) FYI, I thieved my high school honors English class dictionary because I couldn't bear to part with it (shhh, don't tell Mr. Bryant).

6) I like to write at night. Of course, the lure of Jimmy Kimmel is too great, so I end up ditching the writing at midnight, so I'm better off going to bed at a decent hour.

7) I have the best damned ideas EVER, until I put them on paper and submit them to an editor, where it is deemed I write poignant, contrived crap (my interpretation).

8) Interestingly enough, my first book had GMC (goal, motivation and conflict) for all of my characters, even the evil dude. However, it was a light read of 680 pages, and did I mention the contrived crap part?

9) I have always written paranormal stories, even before I KNEW what paranormal was, and before it was the hot, in thing. NO, I don't do vampires. They are scary. There is NOTHING SEXY about having your blood sucked out. I have my blood drawn every month, and I don't ever recall wanting to jump the tech.

10) I have no gift for poetry, so be relieved you won't have to deal with that. Maybe an occasional limerick, but that's about it.